Marked to Market

my wheelbarrow full of cash means i'm extremely wealthy

The economy has never been stronger, and we’re all getting rich.

Also, a nation that has never been more spectacularly wealthy is sinking into debt, with nearly ten percent of credit card accounts falling into delinquency. Here’s a look at consumer debt in a population that’s becoming far more prosperous as markets surge:

Weird. What’s everyone doing with their amazing newfound wealth? Also, record-breaking markets reflect the stunning success of, uh.

You have more dollars, so you’re much wealthier!

Just going out for some coffee, dear

This is a remarkable achievement: we severed the strength of the economy from the success of the market. One keeps going down while the other never stops going up.

In other news, Major League Baseball has announced that each runner crossing home plate will be awarded three runs. This will make players more skilled, because they’ll score more runs. Baseball’s headed for record highs, Ted Lieu.