Democrats: I Can Help You to Save America

You’ll be shocked to hear it, but prominent journalists are freaking out about the mean Supreme Court giving mean Donald Trump unlimited executive power. They haven’t, and the whole claim is incredibly stupid, but let’s play along for a moment. Here’s the Washington Post, warning that now the president suddenly has power over the executive branch of the federal government, which is very scary and bad:

Sample warning from that story: “Gillian Metzger, a Columbia University law professor and expert on administrative law, said she was struck by the breadth of the FTC ruling, which could give Trump direct control over virtually all federal employees.” Imagine the president having substantial authority over the operation of the government!

Similar warning at Vox:

As the important law professor Barbara McQuade just warned on the deeply intellectual MS Now, the sky is falling: Trump’s cronies are seizing control of the entire apparatus of the federal government, giving their dictator figure unchecked power.

So we’re hurtling toward authoritarianism, because one man is consolidating his power over the giant mechanism of the federal government. The federal government regulates commerce and regulates energy and regulates broadcasting and on and on and on, and now just ONE MAN controls it all!

I agree with the premise, and I’ll just end the sentence right there. A giant federal government, exercising extraordinary power over every aspect of American life, is really dangerous, and subject to ideological and factional capture.

But the problem is easily fixed. If Mean Orange Man has seized control over the entire regulatory apparatus, which gives him astonishing levels of unchecked power, then the extremely obvious and entirely achievable solution is to…

…sharply reduce the size, scope, and power of that regulatory apparatus. Like, right now.

Attack Donald Trump, that bastard. He’s scary! We need to cut the federal budget in half right this instant, and slash the federal workforce. We need to take a chainsaw to the foundation of this mean dictator’s unchecked power. If the federal bureaucracy immediately becomes far smaller, hemorrhaging power, then Trump can’t use it to be a fascist. Deep budget cuts are a progressive weapon. Limited government is true social justice, and a bold attack on Trump’s cruel authoritarianism. If his cronies are seizing control of the federal agencies, start eliminating federal agencies.

So I stand with the Democratic Party, now. Donald Trump is terrifying, and we need to take away the instrument of his dangerous power. Imagine what a devastating rebuke it would be to the whole MAGA base to suddenly cut the federal budget in half. Trump would be humiliated.

Get it done, Democrats! Save America from authoritarianism! I’ll just be right here by the lake with this bucket of ice and bottled beer, cheering you on.